Rants for Thought

I am happy. I am not happy. I can't seem to find happiness. Why am i not happy?

All these thoughts of happiness. why do people always seem to want to behave in a certain way. Thinking that happiness is a must in life. It has to be present for one to live a wonderful life. Then again what is life?

Why do people always strive for this notion of happiness. I was reading a another blog about a 13 year old girl feeling empty? She continuously felt despair, never happy. Her friends tried to cheer her up, but she wasnt feelin it.

Im just kinda pissed of at the notions that define our norm. Why must the norm be to feel "happy" What is joy? Must the 17 muscles on cheeks/face expand to give an arc shape below one's nose for a person to be happy? This concept of happiness and sadness. Like one is heaven and one is hell. Norm says we should feel good. when u feel good u can do good things. and all is good. well fuck that. Who decides whats good...some books that have mingled with minds across the millennium. Or is there really some kind of force that makes the specific neural circuits to give us this perception of defeat and victory in life? Is there another name for emotions. Can that name be tested and then of course be falsified?

If you give me a glass of water and ask me is it half full or half empty; most likely ill throw that glass of water in you face and tell you it was half a glass of water. Fuck descriptions. It may be rude and bastard like at this point. But that doesn't seem to decelerate my present attitude. Im just wondering if I am happy or sad.

I shouldn't have thrown the water in your face. No doubt that was exceptionally rude. But you know what, i bet you 'll at least chuckle at a guy mowing a lawn listening to his ipod then suddenly some dooshbag( me ) comes out of nowhere and kicks him in the nuts and tells him to look in the camera while reassuring the victim, "you've been kicked in the nuts."

yea hardy har har...i would laugh as well if i saw a man going through an incident which makes him accept being sterile and not mention excruciating pain in the groin as a possible reality. yea Hardy har har!

So some water in the face is mos def not as bad. And id probably give a "what the hellll" bewildered smile and chuckle if the scene was played back to me. And i dont understand why people try to simplify life, as if their comparisons and what not hold the answers on how to deal with life's questions.

For example, life's like a roller coaster! CLICHE. For the sake of argument, "what is life?' And My answer is go find out!

Though im majoring the study of life even i dont know what life is fully. For me to completely know what it is we can go into respiration and energy production and the autonomous nervous system but thats not really life, these are the mechanisms of life. For life is more than just macromolecules in a system of pathways. And then again, isn't it?

So with that food for for thought, im gonna conclude with happiness.

"even the robot seemed more cheerful than usual. Eventually he realized ... the robot seemed more cheerful in comparison with his own mood." Douglas Adams.

And in comparison with his previous moods. As if we have to define a box for our moods. Please just let me be free. Let me be in any mood that comes naturally.

Thank you very much.